Can Your Ex-Spouse Micromanage Your Childcare Arrangements?
As stressful as it can be to co-parent after divorce, a parenting plan can help you bring order out of chaos. You have it in writing that, during even-numbered years, the children are with you for the duration of Thanksgiving weekend. This means that, if your ex-spouse shows up on the morning of Black Friday as you and the kids are getting in the car to go to the outlet mall, and he demands that the children come with him to have brunch with his girlfriend and her parents, you can tell him to get lost. Your parenting time belongs to you, and it is no longer your ex’s business if you nag your children too much about eating their vegetables or if you aren’t strict enough about bedtime. In other words, once you are divorced, your ex can no longer micromanage you and your relationship with your children. As for childcare, you and your ex do have to discuss it to some extent, because it is an expense that matters when calculating child support. A Birmingham child custody lawyer can help you resolve disputes related to childcare.
Two Homes, One Daycare?
Most spouses who were stay-at-home parents during the marriage must return to the workforce after divorce; this means that most young children of recently divorced parents go to daycare, even if they did not attend daycare before the divorce. The ideal situation is that the child goes to the same day care regardless of which parent drops him off and picks him up. This arrangement enables baby-friendly parenting schedules, such as the parents alternating custody every three days or every week, or Dad picking up the baby from daycare every evening after work and dropping him off at Mom’s house every night before bed.
Two Homes, Two Nannies?
If you can afford in-home child care, then you and your ex will have to account for paying for babysitters or nannies. Don’t let your ex guilt trip you about the number of hours of your parenting time you leave your children in the care of a nanny; it is because of your work schedule, not because you are trying to get your ex to pay more child support. Unless you and your ex have an especially harmonious co-parenting arrangement, it is probably better if each household has its own nanny. If you and your ex live close to each other, so the nanny’s commute is not burdensome, it could be a great source of stability for the children to be with the same nanny at both parents’ houses; this would also mean that the nanny could earn a full-time salary from just one employer. Whether you employ one nanny or two, you and your ex will need to agree on how to split the cost of childcare.
Contact Peeples Law About Childcare Arrangements After Divorce
A Birmingham family law attorney can help you resolve disputes with your former spouse about daycare, babysitters, nannies, and other childcare providers. Contact Peeples Law today to schedule a consultation.